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Jurt Angle

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Jurt Angle
Jurt
Statistics
Names Jurt Angle
Height 5ft 10 in
Weight 240 lbs.
Born December 9th, 1968
Birthplace Mt. Lebanon, Pennsylvania
Died July 12th, 2013 (Aged 44)
Jeri-MAX Spiral Rumble
Resides Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Billed from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Trained by Sharmell Sullivan
Debut 2008
Retired N/A
Jurt Angle is a CAW Star signed to Jeri-MAX. He has also had made sporadic appearances in other leagues such as New-WWE and IWT. Jurt made his debut in the 2008 Jeri-MAX CAW League after Jericho222 made an infamous typo of Kurt Angle's name on the SMF Chatbox. Jurt Angle died on July 12th, 2013 after being murdered by Aladdin Hassan during a Money in the Jeri-Bank cash-in, but was revived by Claude Frollo nearly a year later on June 7th, 2014.

Jeri-MAX (2009-2013; 2014-

Tag Team Champion & Cuban Penile Crisis (2009-2010)

Jurt Angle made his Jeri-MAX return when the e-fed became a full fledged CAW League in late 2009. On the very first episode of WARP, Jurt and one of his countless Guttersluts defeated the team of Dylan Connell and Kevin 11 to become the first ever Jeri-MAX Tag Team Champions. Jurt wouldn't hold the gold for long as he and the Gutterslut went on to lose the titles to D-Generation X just 2 shows later.

Jurt, wanting to use his rematch clause, ran into trouble as the Gutterslut had suffered numerous injuries over the course of the two shows and none of his other guttersluts would fill in. On Episode 4, a Fatal-4-Way was booked by Jurt in order to find a new tag team partner to replace the Gutterslut so he could use his rematch clause at the upcoming CPV. El Jefe would go on that night to defeat Aladdin Hassan, Big Boss Man, and Michael Cole to become Jurt's new partner, forming the team known as the Cuban Penile Crisis. At Jeri-MAX Black Hole, the Cuban Penile Crisis went on to defeat D-Generation X in the main event, making Jurt a two-time Tag Team Champion in the process.

Against all odds, the Cuban Penile Crisis dominated the Tag Team ranks. On Episode 7, after successfully defending the Tag Titles in a rematch with DX, they were forced to immediately defend the titles against the soon-to-debut Hulk Hogan's friends, The Nasty Boys. Despite being in a match right beforehand, Jurt and Jefe managed to win once again, which pissed the Nasty Boys off. At Jeri-MAX Ooze, The Cuban Penile Crisis once again defeated The Nasty Boys, keeping the Tag Team Championships around their waists. After successfully defending their titles one more time against Bulk & Skull on Episode 12, Jurt and Jefe lost the belts at NAW Presents CAW Battlefield to the unlikely pairing of World Heavyweight Champion Hulk Hogan and his #1 Contender, DreCon the Giant.

Singles Run & Intercontinental Champion (2010-2011)

After failing to recapture the Tag Team Championships from Hogan and DreCon, El Jefe turned on Jurt Angle, blaming him for their failures. The two would meet a few weeks later at The All-American American Bash, where Jurt would lose to a much darker and much angrier El Jefe.

After Jurt failed to earn a World Heavyweight Championship match against Hulk Hogan on Episode 15, he partipated in the Spiral Rumble Match along with his doppleganger Kurt Angle. Jurt would enter at number 21 and lasted nearly 9 minutes, eliminating only Lucas Gomez during his time in the ring.

On Episode 18, Jurt would go on to once again lose a match for a World Heavyweight Championship opportunity, this time in a fatal-4-way that the mysterious, masked Vince McSeven would win. However, he would soon bounce back and defeat Sheamus on Episode 20, earning himself a spot in a fatal-4-way to determine the #1 contender for the Intercontinental Championship at Jeri-MAX Horizon. Jurt went on to outlast DreCon the Giant, Lamarell McDaniel, and Grover Cleveland at the event and earn himself an Intercontinental Championship match at Jeri-MAX JeriMania. The champion at the time, Pacman Jones, was a former protege of Jurt's from back in the e-fed days of Jeri-MAX and felt like he had surpassed his former mentor in terms of skills and abilities not only in the ring, but with the ladies. Jurt would prove Pacman wrong and defeat him at JeriMania, earning himself his first major singles championship since the Jeri-MAX e-fed.

Vertex (2011)

After a month into the 2nd Season without any Jeri-MAX shows, Jurt and a bunch of other Jeri-MAX stars, including El Jefe, Dorf Liggleton, Sheamus, Aladdin Hassan, and Lucas Gomez went on strike and formed the group known as Vertex. Bored with a lack of updates from Jeri-MAX, Jurt and Vertex storm into other leagues such as WCW, creating chaos wherever they went. Due to their actions, Jeri-MAX General Manager Sakoda had no choice but to strip Vertex of all their titles, including Jurt's Intercontinental Championship. After 6 months of wreaking havoc in The Vivianverse, Jurt and the rest of Vertex returned to Jeri-MAX at the end of The All-American American Bash.

Immediately after returning, Jurt reformed the Cuban Penile Crisis with El Jefe. They demanded a shot at the The Hardys and their Tag Team Championships but were beaten by fellow Vertex members Lucas Gomez and Aladdin Hassan in a #1 Contender's match on Episode 35. After failing to win back the Intercontinental Championship and once again win the Spiral Rumble, Jurt set his sights on Pacman Jones and the Jeri-MAX World Heavyweight Championship. After both Sheamus and Dorf Liggleton both failed to defeat Pacman, Jurt wanted the opportunity to face the World Champion at Horizon, stating that he's already beaten Pacman before and wants his shot at becoming the first ever Jeri-MAX Triple Crown Champion. The leader of Vertex, Dorf Liggleton, did not want Jurt taking an opportunity that he believed belonged to him and dismissed Jurt's wishes. After losing a tag match and getting into an argument with Dorf on Episode 37, Sakoda would announce that neither man would get a title shot, instead chosing Lamarell McDaniel as the #1 Contender for Pacman's Championship.

Departure & Feud With Vertex (2011-2012)

Following a win over fellow Vertex member Sheamus on Episode 38 of VORTEX, Jurt Angle was confronted once again by Dorf Liggleton. After Jurt once again called into question Dorf's abilities as a leader, he was jumped by Liggleton and Sheamus, effectively removing him from the infamous stable. Dorf would then set up a match between himself and Jurt at the upcoming Horizon CPV in order to make an example out of him for the rest of the group. Unfortunately for Dorf however, Jurt was able to defeat him; only one of many blows to the Vertex group that night as former Tag Team Champions Aladdin Hassan and Lucas Gomez would later quit as well. Jurt would later compete for the European Championship with other former Vertex members at JeriMania II: The Quickening, but Dorf would win up winning the match and the title.

Feud with Chris Jericho & Return (2012-2013)

Jurt Angle would compete in the Jeri-MAX King of Heavens Tournament, however the debuting Chris Jericho would send a video message, distracting Jurt long enough for Matt Eichorn, the eventual tournament winner, to upset him with a victory. Video messages would continue to harrass Jurt until he and Jericho faced off in a match at Jeri-MAX Black Hole, where Jurt would be defeated by Jericho, who was targeting Jurt Angle because he was a top star and beloved face.

After his loss to Jericho, Jurt reunited with El Jefe to form the Cuban Penile Crisis at JMAX 50, but other than that, Jurt was gone for a combined 8-9 months. Jurt would make a shocking return on Episode 53, replacing Pacman Jones in an elimination fatal-4-way to determine who would represent the United States in the Global Equality Tournament at the Jeri-MAX The Global Equality Bash. Jurt would not only win the match, but would eliminate all 3 of his opponents to do so. Jurt Angle would go on to defeat Sakoda, Sheamus, and even Chris Jericho to win the Global Equality Bash Tournament and earn a World title shot at the Spiral Rumble. After the match, Jurt expressed how it's taken him 5 years to earn his opportunity and that it's all or nothing; if he cannot defeat King Matt Eichorn for the Jeri-MAX World Heavyweight Championship, he has vowed to retire from CAW.

Even though he was successful in winning the World Championship from Eichorn and became the first ever Jeri-MAX triple crown winner, Jurt's career would tragically come to an end anyway. During his title win celebration, Aladdin Hassan would make a surprise return, cashing in his Money in the Jeri-Bank contract on Jurt. The entire match was just Hassan using Spitfire on Jurt over and over until he ultimately was killed. Hassan would then cover Jurt's lifeless body and win the Jeri-MAX World Heavyweight Championship.

Revival & Heel Turn (2014-

After his death, Jurt's best friend El Jefe would demand Jeri-MAX General Manager Claude Frollo use his God powers to revive him. Frollo would refuse multiple times for multiple reasons, but after Jefe threatened to quit, the GM agreed to a match at Jeri-MAX Horizon between he and Jefe with the stipulation being that Jurt would be brought back if El Jefe won. Jefe would indeed go on to win the match over Frollo, thus causing the avatar of God to bring Jurt back on Episode 61. However, much to Jefe's surprise, Jurt came back pale, scarred, and quiet. Instead of thanking or even speaking to El Jefe, Jurt Angle instead attacked his former friend with 3 Jurt Angle Slams and an El Jefe Driver.

After attacking Jefe again on the following episode of VORTEX, Jurt spoke for the first time since his death, telling his former friend that he had "ruined everything." On Episode 63, he further explained that by bringing him back, Jefe took him away from 25,006 sex-crazed guttersluts in Hell. Now on Earth, scarred and disfigured, no woman would want to sleep with him. Jurt then announced that Frollo had booked a match between and him and Jefe at JeriMania the Third, where Angle promised to disfigure Jefe so that he'd be able to feel Jurt's pain. Jefe would ultimately get himself counted out of the match instead of fighting his former friend. Afterwards, The Mapacha attacked Jurt thinking he was part of a Lizard Person conspiracy, until Jefe ran back down to make the save. The two friends would soon make up and go out to bang some Japanese guttersluts while drinking milkshakes. Angle challenge The Ladies Man for the Jeri-MAX European Championship in a Hair vs. Penis Match at Jeri-MAX Recoil, which he lost but was saved by El Jefe.

Finishers & Signature Moves

  • Finishing Moves
  • Jurt Angle Slam
  • Signature Moves
    • Ankle Lock
    • Bodyscissors
    • Double Leg Takedown, often transitioned into a pin or a suplex
    • European Uppercut
    • German Suplex, often transitioned into a pin
    • Rear Naked Choke
    • Multiple German Suplexes, usually capping off at three

Title History and Other Accomplishments

Luchas de Apuestas

Wager Winner Loser Location Date
Title/Penis The Ladies Man Jurt Angle Jeri-MAX Recoil April 11, 2015

Entrance Themes

Trivia

  • Jurt Angle was created by Jericho222 on accident one day on the SMF Chatbox. The typo became so popular that the character was given life in the Jeri-MAX e-Fed.

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